Put the Zest Back in Finding Love
As we get older, dating can be a high pressure situation. By now, most of us feel that we have "been there, done that". How do we put the zest back in our quest for love?
Look to 20-somethings! We can follow some advice from the younger crowd, who may be less experienced but are less jaded, to make dating exciting and exhilarating again.
- Light and Breezy
Who knows more about having fun than a 20-something? Don't interrogate your date with serious, severe and down-right daunting questions. Keep it light, breezy and casual. Most people at midlife conduct a date more like an interview than a friendly, social rendezvous. You don't need to know your date's life history. Simple activity dates are a great way to have a relaxed conversation about topics other than each other. Hiking, bike rides, cooking classes and art shows are some suggestions for a fun date that involves a mutually appealing activity that also engages personal interaction.
- New Opportunities
People in their 20's definitely do not have the experience that we have when it comes to dating and that can be a good thing. Even though we may have a reason for being jaded and cynical, it can restrict our opportunities to find love. While we may embark on dating with feelings of apprehension and trepidation, 20-somethings are optimistic and see meeting new people as a possibility of making a connection. No matter if you've been hurt a million times or went through a 'War of the Roses', you will find love again if you are open to finding love. Don't be too narrow minded; you never know what can happen.
The word 'assertive' can often times be linked to being desperate, aggressive, forward and even brazen. It should not be. Having confidence and making the first move is a sure-fire way to come off calm, cool and collected. As those in their 20's see meeting new people they are more likely to seize the opportunity and go for it. It may start with something as simple as saying hello. Afraid of rejection? Don't be, and don't take it personal. For whatever reason, that person might not be into you, but you never know if he/she has single friends!
- Slow Down!
In your 20's, life is wide open, full of possibilities. As we get older, time is running out and all the good ones are taken - at least that is what we often tell ourselves. All this does is add too much pressure to find a relationship. It can cause us to rush into something and "settle". Remember, you're one of the good ones. Allowing yourself time helps you relax and makes decisions that you most likely won't regret. You will learn how to be satisfied and comfortable with yourself, and that optimism and positive attitude will trickle into your dating life. A happy person, after all, is the most attractive! Make use of these lessons from 20-somethings and you are sure to have a fresh and fun approach to finding love.
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