First Date Lessons from a Happily Married Couple
I was at a dinner party Friday night and met a darling couple, Jimmy and Mary Sue. They shared the story of their romance with me, and as I laughed my self silly-- it dawned on me that this funny story was filled with great dating lessons.
Jimmy and Mary Sue have been together ever since their very first date, and that was over 25 years ago! Their love story goes like this: After his first marriage ended Jimmy found himself single and out and about trying to meet eligible women. He had a lifelong buddy who would accompany him around town from time to time...a classic "Wing Man". On one particular evening Jimmy and the Wing Man wandered into a popular restaurant/bar. There he saw Mary Sue and a girlfriend sitting at a table for four. Jimmy and the Wing Man approached the girls and Jimmy asked; "Are these seats taken?" Not only were the girls alone, they were the only people in the entire place. They laughed and invited the guys to join them.
Lesson 1: Guys, be brave to approach and use your sense of humor. If you make us laugh chances are we'll give you a shot.
After sitting and chatting with Mary Sue for a while Jimmy reached out to hold Mary Sue's hand. Last Friday night he again reached over and took her hand and said to me, "Lisa, have you ever seen a more beautiful hand, long delicate fingers." It was so romantic, 25 years later and still so taken by his love.
Lesson 2: A genuine compliment is a powerful way to build a bond with the recipient. It also showcases the giver as someone who cares about other people.
Now back to the story... The group spent more time getting acquainted and finally Jimmy asked Mary Sue if she would be willing to give him her phone number so that he could contact her again. She was completely charmed by the meeting however, Mary Sue said that in those days she never gave out her phone number--so she asked for his business card and said she would be more comfortable calling him.
The following day Mary Sue called Jimmy at his office. He was not in, so she left a message for him to "return the call". Sadly, he NEVER called her back. Six Months Later... Jimmy was cleaning out his briefcase and came across a pink "While You Were Out" message that his assistant had given him with Mary Sue's name and phone number on it. Within a split second he picked up the phone and dialed Mary Sue's number. He couldn't believe it when she answered the phone...caught off guard he said: "Hi Mary Sue, this is Jimmy, I'm returning your call."
Keep in mind, she had left the message for him 6 months earlier and without explanation he simply said, "I'm returning your call". (Pretty funny, right?) Jimmy then asked if Mary Sue would go out with him Friday night? She said "yes". Then it dawned on him that he had his children Friday night...Mary Sue said "that's okay, I'm available Saturday as well". Jimmy said, "Uh, I have the kids Saturday too". To which Mary Sue replied, "Well then we better make it Sunday! They had their first date that Sunday and have been together ever since!
Mary Sue reacted perfectly to Jimmy's "6 month late" return phone call. She did not react in an arrogant way, hurt that it had taken him that long to contact her. She was delighted to hear from him, spontaneous and flexible setting up the date for the coming weekend.
Lesson 3: Don't let your pride or past hurts get in the way when dating. Thanks to my new friends for sharing such a delightful story with me!
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